I normally do not post about such topics as this really doesn’t fit the profile of this site at all. However, I felt compelled to do so as it is full of information that could keep a possible victim safe and may provide a chance for someone to survive. I hope you take a moment to read it and please feel to share it however you feel fit. I have tried to edit it to make it non-gender specific. A growing number of crimes are happening to men and a growing number of perpetrators are women.
A group of rapists and date rapists in prison were interviewed on what they look for in a potential victim and here are some interesting facts:
1] The first thing men look for in a potential victim is hairstyle. They are most likely to go after a woman with a ponytail, bun! , braid or other hairstyle that can easily be grabbed. They are also likely to go after a woman with long hair. Women with short hair are not common targets.
2] The second thing men look for is clothing. They will look for a victim who’s clothing is easy to remove quickly. Many of them carry scissors around to cut clothing away.
3] They also look for a victim using their cell phone, searching through their purse/pockets or doing other activities while walking because they are off guard and can be easily overpowered.
4] The number one place a victim is abducted from/attacked is at a grocery store parking lots.
5] The number two is in office parking lots/garages.
6] The number three is in public restrooms.
7] The thing about these rapists is that they are looking to grab a victim and quickly move him/her to a second location where they don’t have to worry about getting caught.
8] If you put up any kind of a fight at all, they get discouraged because it only takes a minute or two for them to realize that going after you isn’t worth it because it will be time-consuming.
9] These rapists said they would not pick on a victim who has a umbrella or other similar objects that can be used from a distance in their hands.
10] Keys are not a deterrent because you have to get really close to the attacker to use them as a weapon. So the idea is to convince these rapists you’re not worth it.
POINTS THAT WE SHOULD REMEMBER:
1] If someone is following behind you on a street or in a garage or is with you in an elevator or stairwell look them in the face and ask them a question For instance: ‘What time is it?’ or make general small talk: ‘I can’t believe it is so cold out here, we’re in for a bad winter.’. Now that you’ve seen their faces and could identify them in a line- up, you lose appeal as a target.
2] If someone is coming toward you hold out your hands in front of you and yell ‘Stop’ or ‘Stay back!’ Most of the rapists interviewed said they’d leave a victim alone if they yelled or showed that they would not be afraid to fight back. Again, they are looking for an easy target.
3] If you carry pepper spray (this instructor was a huge advocate of it and carries it with him wherever he goes) tell the perpetrator ‘I have pepper spray’ while holding it out so it will be a deterrent.
4] If someone grabs you you can’t always beat them with strength but you can do it by outsmarting them. If you are grabbed around the waist from behind, pinch the attacker either under the arm between the elbow and armpit or in the upper inner thigh – HARD. One victim in a class that was being taught said she used the underarm pinch on a guy who was trying to date rape her and was so upset she broke through the skin and tore muscle. Try pinching yourself in those places as hard as you can stand it; it really hurts.
5] After the initial hit, always go for the groin which is extremely painful. You might think that you’ll anger the guy and make him want to hurt you more, but the thing these rapists told the interviewer was that they want a victim who will not cause them a lot of trouble. Start causing trouble and get the rapist out of there.
6] When the rapist puts there hands up to you, grab there first two fingers and bend them back as far as possible with as much pressure pushing down on them as possible.
7] Of course the things we always hear still apply. Always be aware of your surroundings, take someone with you if you can and if you see any odd behavior, don’t dismiss it, go with your instincts. You may feel little silly at the time, but you’d feel much worse if the person really was trouble.
FINALLY, PLEASE REMEMBER THESE AS WELL ….
I know you are smart enough to know these pointers but there will be some, where you will go “hmm I must remember that”. After reading, forward it to someone you care about because it never hurts to be careful in this crazy world we live in.
1. Tip from Tae Kwon Do: The elbow is the strongest point on your body. If you are close enough to use it, do it.
2. If a robber asks for your wallet/purse, do not hand it over. Toss it away from you…. chances are that they are more interested in your wallet/purse than you and they will go for the wallet/purse. Run like crazy in the opposite direction!
3. If you are ever thrown into the trunk of a car: Kick out the back tail lights and stick your arm out the hole and start waving like crazy. The driver won’t see you but everybody else will. This has saved lives.
4. People have a tendency to get into their cars after shopping, eating, working, etc., and just sit (doing their checkbook, or making a list, etc.) Do not do this! The predator will be watching you and this is the perfect opportunity for them to get in on the passenger side, put a gun to your head, and tell you where to go. As soon as you close the doors lock them and leave.
5. A few notes about getting into your car in a parking lot, or parking garage:
a. Be aware and look around your car as someone may be hiding at the passenger side, peek into your car, inside the passenger side floor, and in the back seat. (Do this before entering a taxi cab also).
b. If you are parked next to a big van, enter your car from the passenger door. Most serial killers attack their victims by pulling them into their vans while the victims are attempting to get into their cars.
c. Look at the car parked on the driver’s side of your vehicle and the passenger side. If a person is sitting alone in the seat nearest your car, you may want to walk back into the place you are leaving and get a guard/policeman to walk you back out. It is always better to be safe than sorry. (And better paranoid than dead.) Do not feel silly asking for security to walk you to your car, they are trained to do this. This also goes for men and women – please do not feel ashamed for asking for help if you feel you may be in danger.
6. Alaways take the elevator instead of the stairs. (Stairwells are horrible places to be alone and the perfect crime spot).
7. If the predator has a gun and you are not under their control, always run! The predator will only hit you (a running target) 4 in 100 times; And even then, it most likely will not be a vital organ. Run!
8. Do not be sympathetic! It may get you raped or killed. Ted Bundy, the serial killer, was a good-looking, well educated man, who always played on the sympathies of unsuspecting women. He walked with a cane, or a limp, and often asked “for help” into his vehicle or with his vehicle which is when he abducted his next victim.
Elaborate dresses, lavish balls, a beautiful countryside and images straight from the canvas of the great artists come to my mind when I think about the Victorian era. The Victorian period or the Victorian era can be termed as the period under the reign of Queen Victoria. This period was between the year-1837 to 1901. I am sure many women would love to slip back into time and fulfill their dream of wearing bustle skirts with some fancy feathered hats at some point in their lives! Rich fabrics and genteel women attending fancy dos with cultured men are some of the glimpses of the life back then! Here’s a look at the kind of fashion followed in the Victorian Era. Victorian fashion has many interesting things to note and you can delve into the depths of Victorian fashion, right here!
The term Victorian fashion is generally used only with regard to the United Kingdom. There were certain clothing styles and mannerisms that were observed during this period. In the early period of the Victorian Era, the silhouette for the woman was more of the demure kind. Women wore pointed bodice, which were long and had fitting waists. The bodice was designed to enhance the waist. In the early period, Victorian clothing for women was about restriction of arm movements. Another interesting feature were the detachable collars! The colors used in the early period of the Victorian fashion were soft, pastel shades. Patterns were delicate and fashionable, all designed to maintain the femininity of the woman.
Beehive shaped skirts was another characteristic feature of Victorian fashion. Here, garments were stiffened to give a particular appearance. Crin also known as horsehair, was used for a particular portion of a garment so that it stiffens in that particular area. Crin was used for hem linings and sleeve heads of the dresses.
Although cloth was manufactured in the mills, Victorian clothing in 1837 was generally designed and assembled by tailors and other such specialized people who were into designing clothes and hats. These people catered to only a specific few of the society who could afford this service; others stitched their clothes at home.
Bell shaped skirts also became a rage and these became wider in the 1830s. The bell shape soon became dome shaped. As these skirts became bigger and flared out, they also needed support from the inside. Victorian dresses therefore needed to be worn with a lot of petticoats. The lower portion was also supported by horsehair, which were woven into the pattern for the stiffened look.
The cashmere shawl was also a prominent feature of Victorian fashion. It was particularly noticed in 1840. By then, the shawl was used as wrap over the dresses. Women also wore heavy fabrics such as satins and silks and there was also a time when fabric dictated the status of the person in the society as well.
Slowly these huge ballooned Victorian skirts gave way to the hobble skirts. Hobble skirts brought into fashion narrow skirts, where in knee length corsets were combined with the entire ensemble. Hobble skirts often restricted movement, which is probably why they have been given this name. These slim skirts created a problem for women in the comfort factor yet they gained popularity with time. Today, the slim pencil skirt can still be witnessed in the fashion scenario in many modified ways.
Apart from horsehair, bustles were also used to increase the fullness of the skirts. Bustles were used to make the waist look smaller. Many times, the fullness of the fashion was spread out towards the back and this often fanned out in the shape of a train. Bustles were also seen in different shapes. Sometimes, these also created a hump below the waist area on the backside, which was considered to be a fashion statement in the Victorian era. The bustle therefore, can be considered to be yet another typical feature of Victorian fashion.
Victorian fashion for men was about Norfolk jackets and the sack suits. Men preferred to don themselves in casual attire.
Victorian fashion was thus quite elaborate as far as women’s clothing was concerned. Victorian clothing is still very much popular and the basics have been woven into new modern designs to create contemporary attire!